Update on what I got and my first reactions.
I ordered the POC matching underoos:
The Spine VPD 2.0 Jacket gives full back, chest, shoulder and elbow protection with great flexibility and freedom of movement. Product Highlights Complete upper body protection Exceptional impact absorption Height adjustable waistband Product Description The Spine VPD 2.0 Jacket gives full back...
na.pocsports.com
TL;DR Expensive, non-bulky, non-restricting, unattractive, flimsy seeming but in the end very effective most likely but zero fun. More condom than sex toy.
This gear is expensive, $350, and $120 respectively. I jingled around on the POC website and signed up for the newsletter and got 10% off with free shipping.
The build is nice but it felt like heavy stiff foam, effectively placed but really seems lingerie-class wrapping in spandexy thin stretchy mesh.
I geared up and went for a mountain bike ride just to see how all this felt.
Layers were inside to outside: skin, light polypro, POC armor underoos, the usual outer layer of shorts, and heavy poly-pro outer top.
- The upper fit was very close to my body. My usual, already pretty snug gear, fit over the armor top without issue. I was surprised that I wasn't more bulked up and the polypro top and my ski jacket still fit over the armor.
- The bottoms throw out a lot of hip, rendering my svelte hips much less attractive. I don't think I could fit my street jeans over them. I ski in knickers so I don't think it will be an issue for my use case.
- Overall the armor 'rectangles' your body like an aged quarterback's padding in the NFL. It is a blocky, purposeful look for the fashion sensitive out there.
- The padding is a few pounds of quite dense foam. Stiff plastic would be lighter.
- The armor was not very obtrusive or noticeable riding around unless I thought about it.
- I believe that if I took a hit the pads would be where they needed to be despite my concerns about the flimsy positioning from lingerie wrapper--the outer layers of polypro/clothes help with the positioning. This is in contrast to how the Dainese jacket from my initial post (https://www.dainese.com/us/en/bike/...689_color=BLACK&cgid=bike-safety-back#start=1) looks which seems like it could be an outer layer because it has so much structure. This is underwear to be sure.
- The chest/back pads of the top can be removed, as can the butt pad. Hip pads, shoulder, and elbow pads are sewn in.
- Instructions are hand-wash only in cold water. This is all going to stink is my guess. We will see if they made any efforts to fight off the bugs that produce the stink via the inclusion of silver or the like. I'd have preferred all pads to be removable and the enclosing lingerie to be machine washable separately.
- I don't think the armor will interfere with upper body/lower body separation.
- Other than the weight, I don't think this will be an issue in slalom racing or any other downhill skiing activity.
Overall this has the feel of an appropriately engineered solution to the problem at hand as delivered by a bunch of up-tight swedes. Because of the lack of structure/shell I don't think this is a candidate for multiple hits in a fall but entirely appropriate for the first hit which is going to be 95% of the times it will be needed. It is a hassle to use but as hassles go it is minimal and the benefits are huge--yes, like condoms.